Current Mood: encouraged

Isn’t it funny how it warms your heart to run into someone you’ve not seen in a while? I had just that experience yesterday. I ran into the guy who used to be the youth pastor at my church. His name is Terry. I really don’t see him that often anymore, usually just when he comes in about his phone. It always does my heart good though. He is now the pastor of his own church about 35 minutes away. I’ve always looked up to him a lot. He’s about my age…actually I think he’s a little younger than I am, but he’s really got it together.

At 25, I was considerably older than most of the “kids” in the youth group at church, but I still preferred to participate in the services and activities with them. Most of the young adults stayed in there too so it wasn’t like I was the only one older…. Anyway, I really enjoyed hearing Terry preach. He taught with such maturity but on a level that was easy to understand. I always left there feeling encouraged and that I had learned something. He made me want to be a better person…a better Christian. He made me want to learn more and draw closer to God. And not necessarily because of him, but rather how I saw Jesus through him.

He had this way about him that he seemed to always know when something was going on too. I was hanging out with the wrong group of people… actually one in particular that was actually also going to church there but put on a really good facade {but that’s neither here nor there}. Its as if somehow he just knew that I was slipping away and had been up to no good. I don’t know if its because the other kids gossiped and told him stuff or if he just knew. But he always seemed to know. He’d ask me, “Are you staying out of trouble?”, give me “the look”, and just smile. And it would break my heart each and every time because I felt he was disappointed in me.

Because of my schedule, I’ve only been to church a few times since I’ve worked at my current job {about 3 years}, and when I went… things just weren’t the same. All the “kids” are now grown up and married, I don’t know many people anymore, and Terry isn’t there. Also, Terry’s dad was the pastor and he’s recently left to do mission work. I feel like a stranger when I’m there, but with that missing in my life, I feel like a fish out of water.

Talking to Terry yesterday, I learned that there’s a new pastor starting at the church tomorrow. He’s a younger guy, around my age probably. Supposedly, he’s really good. I asked at work if I could come in a little later tomorrow so I could go to church. Its a “no-go” though. There’s only one other person working in the back tomorrow. I’m really bummed out about that, but I hope to be able to go again soon. A part of me feels like perhaps I ran into Terry for a reason… maybe I should give it another try with this new pastor. It might be exactly what I’m looking for all over again.

Current Mood: stoked

With 2009 just hours away, I’ve made my list of resolutions for the new year.

1. Lose weight- I say this every year, but seriously, I’ve got to do something! I’ve really let this craziness go on for far too long. I feel like crap all the time and look worse. Besides, I can’t go to Me-he-co in April looking like this. They’ll think there’s a beached whale sunbathing.

2. Get back into church on a regular basis. This is a huge part of my life that has been missing for quite some time. I work so much… almost every single Sunday. Despite my begging and pleading, they won’t give us a split shift on Sunday. It is so frustrating. I’ve kinda been unsure about where to go too. The church I belong to has changed so much and I don’t really feel like I “fit” there anymore. I used to do a lot of stuff with the youth group, but all those kids are grown and gone now. I don’t really know anybody there who is my age now. And on top of all that, the pastor has left and I don’t believe they’ve found a new one yet. So, I guess I’m kinda looking for a church.

3. Devote more time to me- doing my toenails, getting manicures, my hair done and such. I let those things go too often.

4. Sleep and rest more. Getting 8 hours of sleep each night lessens your chance of having heart disease. I rarely get 8 hours now. Yet again, I need to spend more time focusing on me.

5. Pay off some debt. I don’t have a lot, but I don’t want to have any. As of November, my car was paid for. I’ve also paid off some credit cards in 2008. I’m gonna try to knock out most of the odds and ends this year and I’ll be almost completely debt free if not entirely.

6. Read more. I have stacks of books that are waiting to be read and there are hundreds of books I know I’d enjoy, I just never make the time to read. I’ll have to cut out some internet time to make this one happen though. I’m sure I can find a happy balance.

7. Be a better friend. I think I do okay with this most of the time, but I don’t always remember to make time for my friends, remember birthdays, check on people I’ve not heard from in a while. I really could do better… I’m gonna try to work on that.

8. Spend more time with my family. My family lives about 45 mins away and I don’t get to see them as often as I’d like. My nephew turns 4 in a couple of weeks and I know I’m missing out on so very much.

9. Be more organized. I really need to go through my closets and drawers and clean out stuff I’m not using. I tend to be a pack rat sometimes.

10. Keep my career options open. I have a good paying job now but most of you know the headaches that go along with it. And I see absolutely no opportunity for advancement. I feel bored, burnt out, and just stuck. I’ve not been really looking for anything else, but if I stumble across something decent, I’m going to give it a good consideration. Right now, my job takes up so much of my life and my schedule is never consistent. And we have to ask for days off over a month in advance. I really can’t plan anything. My job is the main reason I’m having to make the majority of my other resolutions. In general, it makes me very unhappy. I’d take a job making less money if it meant I’d have a normal routine again and less stress. Surely my sanity is worth something.

I’m kinda stoked about the new year and all the things it will bring. 2009 is gonna ROCK! Happy New Year!!!

Current Mood: motivated

Yep, I’m still here. I work retail so this month has been SUPER DUPER busy for me. I’m WAY behind on my blog reading and haven’t updated here in forever. As a matter of fact, when I logged back in to my Wordpress admin, I had forgotten that I had upgraded and the new dashboard took me by surprise.

Just a few more days left in ‘08 and for me that means just a few more days left to eat bad food. Yet again, I’m going to make a resolution to lose weight. I’ve been saying it for months. Actually, I say it every year. Several years ago, I actually did it… and I’ve since let it creep back on me. Its pathetic. I used to be cute. Hot even, if you will. I was the arrogant one. Not that I really want to be arrogant, but some people said I was. But now I’m really insecure. I hate meeting new people. I hate being at work where people see me everyday. I hate going places where people will see me. I hate being in pictures. People tag me in pictures on MySpace and I deny the requests because I don’t want anyone else to see how fat I am. I just don’t like myself at all right now. I know I shouldn’t base my self-worth on what size clothing I wear, but a large part of me does. I’m embarrassed to be me right now, but I’m going to do something about it.

Anyway… Tasha and I are planning a trip to Mexico in April so I’ve got to drop some serious poundage before then. My birthday is tomorrow and then you’ve got New Year’s, but on 1-1-09, it is on like Donky Kong! Now, if I could just get Jillian Michaels to move in with me and kick my butt in gear.

Oh, and if you have yet to get me a Birthday gift, don’t fret! You still have one more day to shop! I’d very much like to have a Wii Fit with the Jillian Michaels Fitness Ultimatum 2009. I don’t think anyone else has gotten that yet…

Current Mood: jolly

1 . Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?
~Hot Chocolate. I can’t stand Egg Nog.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?
~Santa wraps all of our gifts, unless its a really big one that would be very hard to wrap.

3. Colored lights on house/tree or white?
~Just white lights, please.

4. Do you hang mistletoe?
~Nope. I’m afraid Bella will get ahold of it.

5. When do you put your decorations up?
~Shortly after Thanksgiving, usually

6. What is your favorite Christmas dish (excluding dessert)?
~We usually just have finger foods so I can’t say I really have a favorite.

7. Favorite holiday memory as a child?
~Waking up to all the presents and watching the parades

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
~What truth…?

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?
~When I was a child, I always begged to, but now I don’t.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
~all white lights, and most of the ornaments are dark blue, light blue, silver, and white. This year, Tim and Sky decorated the tree and it has spares stuck on it with candy canes. I like a really uniform tree and the randomness is making me nuts this year. I don’t know why I fret, Bella’s gonna eventually knock everything off of it anyway.

11. Snow. Love it or dread it?
~LOVE IT! I wish we got more.

12. Can you ice skate?
~Dunno. Never tried.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift?
~Ehh.. not really.

14. What is the most important thing about the holidays for you?
~Reflecting on what the season is about… the birth of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and all of the blessings God has given us.

15. What is your favorite holiday dessert?
~I can only pick one?? Ok, the Christmas cookies.

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition?
~Just spending time with family.

17. What tops your Christmas tree?
~It used to be a beautiful angel, until Ms. Bella was responsible for her decapitation last year. She hasn’t yet been replaced.

18. Which do you prefer giving or receiving?
~Giving. I like making other people happy.

19. What is your favorite Christmas song?
~Mary Did You Know

20. Candy Canes. Yum or Yuck?
~Yum!

21. What do you want for Christmas?
~I’d like a new comforter set for my bed.

22. Do you attend an annual Christmas party?
~Usually for work, but neither of our jobs is having one this year.

23. Do you dress up for Christmas Eve or wear PJ’s?
~PJs if I’m at home.

24. Do you own a Santa hat?
~Yes, and reindeer antlers too.

25. Who do you normally spend Christmas with?
~Tim’s family and then we’ll go see my family.

Current Mood: happy

Christmas is just around the corner! It’s time to start thinking about putting up the tree, shopping, and getting my Christmas card list together. And I’d like to share it with all of you! If you wanna trade Christmas cards, fill out the form below with your address and I’ll reply back with mine. I’ve moved since last year and I know some of you have too. If we traded cards before and your addy changed, I’d love it if you’d give me your new one. Don’t worry, it won’t be posted here.